Sweet Shrubs and Honeysuckles

Bertie Mae had a few favorite things that everyone in the family knew about.  Depending on what time of year she would be itching to enjoy some of God’s sweetest little creations.  My grandmother was not a woman who enjoyed canned or processed foods.  She grew up in a simpler time where people still lived off the earth and respected the natural blessings.  As I examine myself and how I can improve, I wonder if the “advancements” we have made are not somewhat detrimental.  It’s nice every now and then to take a stroll down memory lane and enjoy the simple life.  Come take a walk with me.

I loved a nice breezy Saturday afternoon when Granny would ask Mom to take a drive over to New Liberty and go up the mountain and look for sweet shrubs.  Not only would it mean a stop at Tillison’s for ice cream, but it would mean a heavenly smell in the house for several days.  If you don’t know, sweet shrubs have one of the best scents on earth.  Granny would love to cut them, put them in a mason jar filled with water and sit them in her trailer.  Within an hour, the smell would envelop the entire home.  She would open the windows and let the wind blow through and just sit back and enjoy.  Sweet shrubs truly are the air freshener from nature.

My cousins and I used to love honeysuckles.  I don’t think you can call them a flower they are probably classified as a weed.  We would pick them, pluck a small weed from the bloom and taste the sweet moisture on the tip.  I remember asking Granny one time why honeysuckles had that sweet tip on them and she told me it was a reminder from God that at the end of everything bitter could be something sweet.  Today I went for a walk to get fresh air and enjoy the wind and sounds of nature.  The birds are chirping more, the Bradford Pear trees are in full bloom.  I was thinking about my grandmother and the many heartfelt chats we had.  When I think about the ups and downs of depression and life in general, I think about the sweetness at the end of the bitter weed of the honeysuckle.  Regardless of what we go through in life, we have to rest in the knowledge there will be a sweet ending.  When I am in the middle of a manic episode or stuck in some tribulation, it’s hard to see the positive side of things.  This is why it is important for us to plant as many seeds as possible to help each other find ways to pull out of the bad cycles.  As I grow in my spirituality and mature as a man, I am finding it easier to see God’s big picture and trust in the unseen.  My sweet memories of Granny certainly prepared me for what I would have to deal with in life.

Another life lesson my grandmother taught me was how to shuck corn.  As a young boy, I absolutely loathed corn.  I wanted to spend my summer vacation swimming, watching TV and just having a good time, but every day, my grandmother made us work in the garden.  We would all gather on her front porch and shell peas, break beans, and of course the dreaded corn shucking.  You had to take each ear of corn and peel back the outer shuck, which was not hard, but then it was covered in silk.  Strings of silk covered each ear.  It would take me way to long as I procrastinated having to pick up another cob by peeling away one or two strings at a time.  Granny had a fly swatter lying beside her and she was not afraid to use it.  She told me that if I worked slowly and “put off” doing that job that I would do that with everything in life.  There are still chores today that I hate to do and I put them off.  Every time I do, I think about shucking corn and how my Granny would finish an ear in about thirty seconds.  Our obstacles in life are just like those ears of corn.  You peel away one layer and there may be a lot of work left to do before you reach the finish line.  If you face your fears, conflicts, and challenges, conquering them quickly and earnestly, you will have a wonderful finished product.

If you look inside your heart, you can find inspiration to help you get through the tough times.  Just like with any physical illness, depression and other emotional problems can cause a lot of pain and discomfort.  I am sharing these memories and thoughts with you because it has helped me to make progress against an obstacle that I never thought I could beat.  You can do the same.  Plant some memories of sweet shrubs, honeysuckles and corn on the cob in your mind and you can replay them when things get you down.  God is the greatest doctor and the best medicine we could ever have.  Be thankful that He blesses us with all we need to get through this life.  There is a happy ending, because Jesus said, “In my Father’s house, there are many mansions.” 

If you are suffering or know someone who is, please don’t ignore it.  Reach out and seek the help from God.  Sometimes he helps us through medical doctors and sometimes it’s through the help of a friend or fellow Christian.  If you need guidance or counseling, I am always here.  I share these thoughts for self healing and to reach those who may feel they have no hope.  Won’t you help me?  Love to all.

Learning To Wait

I really don’t know if I can blame it on depression or bipolar disorder or if it is just a major character flaw, but nonetheless I have always had a problem with patience.  When I was young, I had an obsession with being early for everything.  I couldn’t stand it if we were the last to arrive at a family gathering.  I had to be the first pupil in the classroom at school and at church on Sunday.  As an adult, I have been criticized by others, one boss even telling me that the internet is not fast enough for me.  It’s so ironic because my brother and sister were completely opposite growing up.  Tony and Becky both just went with the flow.  Before my brother passed away, he used to tell me, “relax…you are wound tighter than that watch you are always checking.”

It is light-hearted and fun to joke about being obsessed with time and impatience to a certain point, but when you start applying that to your relationship with God, it can get you in a little trouble.  For most of my adult life I have struggled with God’s concept of time.  When I pray sometimes I automatically assume that prayer will be answered within twenty-four hours.  God doesn’t necessarily work that way.  Fortunately with time…and maturity in our relationship with God we come to learn that all things work out perfectly according to His plan.  This lesson is something that I have only come to learn in recent years.  Wait for God and let Him work His plan.  If I serve Him every day the way that I know I should, then He can do the work He needs to do and shape the circumstances that need to be shaped in order to answer my prayer. 

At church we sing this song, “Teach Me Lord To Wait.”   It may very well be the most beautiful and poignant song in our hymnal.  “Teach me Lord to wait, right down on my knees, til in Your on good time, You answer my pleas.  Teach me not to rely on what others do, but to wait in prayer for an answer from You.”  Later the song goes into a beautiful chorus where it celebrates “they that wait upon the Lord.”  One of our sisters, Rhonda Coleson, hits this beautiful note in her upper register and it just sends chills up my spine.  Usually, I hold hands with the person sitting next to me on this song because it is so emotional and spiritually uplifting.  If you really concentrate on the words and apply the principle to your life, it makes so much sense and will help strengthen your relationship with God and your faith that He WILL answer.

The people who love me the most and are around me more than others get really frustrated with my mood swings.  So many times I have heard my best friend say to me, “I just don’t understand.”  Regardless of the understanding, my friends are still patient….they “wait” for my mood to lift and the depression to pass.  I am fortunate to have that kind of love in my life, because so many people who suffer from this terrible disease don’t.  I believe you have to surround yourself with friends who will stay and be patient.  It’s so important to embrace your spirituality and Christianity when you suffer from depression or any ailment.  I honestly can’t imagine how anyone gets through a day without talking to God and knowing that He is working on their behalf. 

When I start getting impatient about my prayers now, I try and think about what God would want from me.  I think of Him building something great and every time I get impatient, He has to stop what He is doing and look down at me and say, “would you stop with the whining, I am busy building a great future for you!”  I truly believe that God wants to live in joy and not sadness and depression or worry.  I think that He is aware of our needs long before we pray them, yet He still wants us to ask.  Once we pray and express our desires and wishes, He decides the when, where and how.  It may take years for certain things to work out.

All of my life I have dreamed of being a successful writer.  Honestly as a young man I never thought I would be reaching people by writing and speaking about depression and God.  I wanted to write dramas and suspense-filled thrillers.  I would write and then abandon it.  I have never stuck with anything longer or felt more passionate than when I am writing and speaking about depression and the need for a strong relationship with God to overcome it.  I believe I was never successful writing in the past because God was preparing me for His plan.  My passion and my dreams are going to come true, but it must be in line with what God expects and needs. 

If you have a dream in your heart and you just can’t stop thinking about it, you can take it to the bank that God put it there.  The question is how will you pursue it and what doors will open?  If we try and do things alone and force results that aren’t part of God’s plan, then we are out there on our own and we have to deal with the stress and the worry of life.  When we pray and wait on God to give us the answer and the direction…the dream will begin to take form as reality.  God doesn’t want us to worry.  He wants us to live joy-filled lives. 

My dream of being a successful writer and speaker makes me very anxious, but it’s GOOD anxiety.  I feel excited to the point that I can’t wait to see what He has in store for me next and what direction He wants me to take.  I can’t wait to see how He inspires me.  It comes with age and it comes with maturity in your spiritual relationship.  Learning to wait on God to work out the plan is an important step in making your dreams come true.  “They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength.  They shall mount up with wings like eagles.”  I just can’t wait to see what’s around the corner because I am ready to fly like an eagle.  I hope you will too.  Love to all.