For many years I have billed myself as a columnist and
blogger on the topic of “overcoming depression,” but the truth is I haven’t
overcome anything, I am right slap dab in the middle of it. I gave my first public speech on the topic of
depression and Christianity in 2007 at the Ohatchee Church of Christ. My friend and Minister, Wayne Dunaway had
encouraged me for months that the Church and the World needed to hear my story
and my views. For almost 7 years now my
battle has been more public than private.
It can be overwhelming, but it’s the right thing to do.
One of my favorite supervisors and mentors of all time is a
lady named Betty Hamrick. She is
probably one of very few people in this world who can walk the talk every day,
day in and out. She is a widow, a mother
of 3, and a grandmother. She is also a
tremendously successful businesswoman with the motto, “I stay above
reproach.” To simplify that motto, she
just tries to do everything the right way. Her words, leadership, and example
have followed me for many years and sometimes I succeed at trying to be like
her and sometimes I fail miserably.
One of the greatest benefits of being a born-again Christian
is that you understand and appreciate the gift of Salvation! Every day is a new day. God created us to be
exactly who we are. The strengths and
weaknesses that I possess are different from those of anyone else. I can’t be Betty every day, but she was
placed on my path in life to teach me to strive to improve where I need to.
I know in my heart that I am doing the right thing talking
about depression. One in three Americans
will face a major depression in their lifetime.
For some of us it is not temporary, it is a disease that has no
cure. It is an illness that can be
managed, better sometimes, and worse others.
I am not champion or leader beyond what anyone else is, but I do
recognize that God gave me a talent. He
gave me the ability and the strong desire to write and speak publicly. It would be narcissistic of me to write and
speak about space travel, art, design, construction, or other things that I
know nothing about. However, I know
plenty about depression, I live with it day in and day out.
My depression is so bad at times that I can barely get out
of bed. I make grandiose plans the night
before. I tell myself “you will get up
at 5 AM and write three chapters, work out for an hour, drink a pot of coffee
and watch Fox and Friends, all before going to work a 12 hour day.” Sadly, when the alarm sounds, I can’t muster
the energy to crawl from my security spot…my bed. Most nights I toss and turn until the wee
hours of the morning, only falling asleep from pure exhaustion. I ache in my back, neck, shoulders and legs
from self-induced stress and tension. I
think about how much time I have wasted in my life fighting this disease then I
think how it would have been over so many years ago if I had not been willing
to fight. God is preparing
something. He is using me for
something. In my heart, I just know that
there is a reason I am experiencing more, learning more, and becoming less and
less inhibited.
Jesus is my Savior and I am a very faith-driven and
religious man, strong in all my convictions and brave in battle against those
who would criticize faith. Even though,
I struggle daily, prayer is my medicine and God is my healer. Publicly discussing a mental disorder may be
frowned upon by some “religious” leaders and organizations, but we can’t allow
that to keep us from helping one another and reaching our potential as God’s children. Being a Christian who also suffers from
depression is a gift. It is a
responsibility just as any Christian diagnosed with heart disease or
cancer. We must stand up and use our
faith and encourage others to turn to God in all things. Christians have the ability to turn negatives
into positives and reach so many people that non-believers or naysayers can’t
reach. My good friend and sister in Him,
Gina Brown once told me that I continue to experience everything I do so that I
can be more compassionate to others who have even worse symptoms. I believe this. I aspire to help others.
I would be deceiving you if I didn’t say there is another
reason I am so public about my struggles.
I do it for personal accountability.
As frightening as it was for me to tell everyone I love and respect that
I battle depression and suffer from Bipolar disorder, it is not as frightening
as realizing that you have the ability and desire to plan your own death. Fortunately for me since I have become so
outspoken, I have become more accountable to the friends and loved ones in my
life and it limits my ability when I am in those dark places to contemplate
suicide.
I have been doing more research for a speaking tour at my
job and there are staggering numbers about youth suicides. Over 4,600 adolescents die each year from
suicide because they think there is no other way out of a bad situation. For anyone who lives with depression and has
a strong will to live and help others, we must do something about these
statistics. This is happening in our own
country and it is a mistake to stand by and allow these children to die.
The best intervention advice I can give is in 3 simple
steps. The first is talk about it. A person suffering must be willing to say it
out loud and tell their story to others.
The more people they can tell, the more accountable they are, the safer
they become. The second step is to pray
daily as many times as possible and get everyone in their circle to pray for
victory. God must be a daily factor in
your recovery! Finally, do the research
and seek the kind of help you need. It’s
different for each individual but the necessity of seeking help is equally
critical for everyone. It will not get
better on it’s own. There are many
options including antidepressants, herbs, talk therapy, etc.
Please share this blog with anyone you know who might suffer
from depression or any mental illness.
There is no shame in living the best life you possibly can!
Love to you all…
