This Must Be What They Call The Ocean

It was the summer of 1994 and I had been reassigned to the Huntsville area with my job. Granny (Bertie Mae) and I had never been separated. In fact she had lived directly behind my parents for the entire 22 years of my life. We talked on the phone every single night and I ventured home every off day. Finally she asked me to take her to Huntsville with me for a short visit. "I just want to see where you sit on the couch when we talk on the phone," she explained. "It will me make me feel better if I can imagine you there when you call."

I picked her up in my small white pick-up and we headed north on US 431. As we approached the town of Guntersville I explained to her that we would be crossing a lot of water and she should not be nervous. As we crossed the large bridge over Lake Guntersville (The Tennessee River), her mouth dropped and she raised up in the seat. She gasped, "this must be what they call the ocean?" I laughed a little and then realized she was serious. I asked, "Granny, have you never seen the ocean?" She replied that she had never seen anything, travel had not been a part of her life.  In her younger days, cotton fields along highway 21 were all she saw.  She never had the means to travel. Immediately the wheels in my mind began to turn.

I told my mother and other family members of my plans to take Granny to see the ocean.  They were panic-stricken at the thought of her traveling that far.  My friends laughed and asked, "you want to take your 86 year old grandmother to the beach?"  I certainly did. In my heart I knew it would be the most precious memory of the two of us.  She was thrilled when I visited her on my next off day and told her of our plans.  She practically packed her bag that day.

Two weeks later I drove her to Gulf Shores, Alabama. We stayed in a beautiful high rise hotel where all the rooms had a private balcony overlooking the beach. She couldn't tell what she was about to see when we drove in because the tall buildings along the strip blocked her view and her sight was already bad. My anxiety built like my tears are now as I write this. We rode the elevator up to our room on the 8th floor. I walked her out on the balcony and she literally stumbled backwards gasping at what she saw. She absolutely could not believe her eyes. We spent two days and nights on that balcony laughing and talking about things and enjoying God's most wonderful and beautiful creation.  Before we left, she said to me, "this is it, what I am going to imagine Heaven is like." I have had a lot of fun in my life, but nothing has ever filled my heart with joy like that trip.

Nine years later,  at the age of ninety-four, in the wee hours of an October Tuesday morning, we reached the last few moments of her life. All the family was gathered around, but I was at the head of her bed craddling her in my arms. Just before she slipped away, I whispered "I will see you at the beach."......and I surely will.  I keep a picture of the two of us strolling on the beach hand in hand on my desk at work and in my bedroom .  To me, that's what Heaven will be like; Granny and I strolling arm and arm along Heaven's shore.  Love to you all.

The Power Of The Word

Some people are wired to crave power and influence in the world.  Heads of state like President Obama,  Vladimir Pooten and David Cameron must be the type of individual who seek great responsibility and control.  It’s not a bad trait, it is actually necessary in their role.  They have tremendous decisions to make that impact the lives of hundreds of millions of citizens. The average Joe however, is not as influential, but the power they do possess may make or break those around them.

Each of us has influence over our loved ones, friends, colleagues, and brethren.  It varies in degree with each person.  To much who is given, much is expected.  The more influential our roles are, the more we should consider our words.  John 8:7 explains this in regards to the judgment of others.  “But when they continued asking him he lifted up his head and said to them, let him who is without sin cast the first stone at her,” regarding the accused adulterous woman.  All of our words or comments are not necessarily as harsh judgment as this story in the Bible, but when is it ever acceptable to kick a person when they are already down?

In my younger days, I was known for having a “sharp tongue.”  I actually took pride in my ability to put people in their place.  This is not something to be proud of and there are many things I wish I could take back.  Unfortunately there are so many that I can’t remember them all.  We should never hide behind a title or assigned responsibility to tear others down.  There is a tactful way to discipline or assign accountability when needed.  As I have matured, not only in age, but in my spirituality, I understand the importance of immolating Jesus.  Words are powerful and can be extremely hurtful.  I don’t want to be a man known for harming others with words.  In the eyes of the Lord, this could be as negative as harming someone with a stone.

My organization recently parted ways with a colleague.  It was a mutual decision, but for self-justification purposes this person felt it necessary to outline everything the organization had done wrong in an email.  Not once did this person accept responsibility for their actions.  They seemed to have forgotten how much they lobbied our group for a position.  Failing to meet objectives is generally a result of wrongdoing by multiple parties, both company and employee.  As individuals, our narcissistic tendencies can prevent us from accepting personal accountability.  Words have the ability to leave people with a poor impression of you.  Now that so much communication happens via email and text, the tone or personality behind a comment is not shown and we must exercise careful judgment.

Matthew 15:18 says “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person.”  If harsh words are spoken and left to linger, it’s hard to erase the damage or turn back the clock.  What we say, is truly how we feel and is immediately recognized by the person on the receiving end and by God. 

The power of speech should be used for good.  We have the ability to lift one another out of the depths of depression or despair with a simple kind word.  Proverbs 16:24 illustrates it best with, “Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.”  I am one of those people who needs as much sweetness and health as I can possibly get.  I am glad I am making progress as an older man in giving them as well.

A sweet friend of mine has been encouraging me lately as she always does.  She advises that if you want to see blessings come your way, do something special for others.  Use some talent or ability you have to give a blessing to another person who might need it.  I love to send cards, letters, encouraging emails, etc.  I have set a goal in 2013 to send a card, letter, or email to someone I care about every single day for the entire year.  I am not doing this to qualify for extra blessings from God, but to further my own growth as a Christian and to remind myself that I should think of others first.

As Christians it is ultimately our responsibility to turn the other cheek when we have been verbally assaulted.  It is difficult at times, but it is necessary according to God’s Word.  It is not necessary for a Christian to lash out or seek revenge on those who harm or judge us.  God assures His children that it will be taken care of with heaping coals of fire.

May God bless all of us and may we learn in 2013 to better use our words for the power of good!  Love to you all.