Back in the 1970’s and 1980’s the cotton mills were
flourishing throughout northeast Alabama.
In Calhoun County at least four or five mills ran seven days a week and
three shifts. A young boy’s parents
worked second and third shift at a couple of the mills. The adults rarely saw each other because
their work schedules just had them pass briefly in the night. It seemed as if the couple could never quite
seem to get ahead. It took everything
Earned just to make ends meet.
That’s a normal kind of stress that many families went through then and
still do now. It can take a toll on a
marriage, a relationship, and a family.
When the weekends or holidays rolled around and the couple
was home at the same time, it seemed to be nothing but trouble. The small single wide mobile home didn’t
yield any space for a “man cave” for the man of the house or a “sewing parlor”
for the lady. Both adults were tired and
stressed all the time and had very short fuses.
Every day they were together for more than a few hours it seemed that a
fight would occur.
The fights were not like normal bickering, they were
brutal. Being raised with several
brothers on a cotton farm, the mother was tough as nails and stood her ground a
little too much. She often threw the
first punch. There were many punches
thrown. Frying pans caused large knots
on the tops of heads. Black eyes from a chair leg and knife wounds from
threatening to stab one another were common.
As the children stood by screaming and begging for their parents to
stop, their cries would go unheard, drowned out by the yelling and
screaming. The little boy, even at the
young age of seven was charged with trying to break up the fight while the
younger sister ran next door to fetch the grandmother. When Granny would burst through the kitchen
screen door with a broom in her hand and separate the two adults who lost
control of their emotions and common sense, a small sense of normalcy would
begin to return for a while.
The little girl would dry her eyes and run off to play, but
it had a lasting effect on the little boy.
A dark closet at the end of a large room built on the front of the
mobile home became a hiding place.
Climbing over boxes of clothes, toys, and stored Christmas decorations,
he would find solace in this quiet place.
Life’s stress may have caused the parents to hurt each other physically
and emotionally, but the young boy bore the burden that would stay with him for
the rest of his life. Worries and heavy
emotions caused serious gastrointestinal problems including ruptured appendix,
inflamed gallbladder and eventually Crohn’s disease.
God is a powerful and forgiving Creator. Eventually the couple was blessed with a grandchild
and it changed their ways. They mended
their relationship, repented of their sins and obeyed the Gospel. The kids grew up and found their own way and
their own worries. The little girl ran
away at eighteen, married and divorced quickly and feels great resentment. The little boy still has a hard time facing
the world some days and can only find comfort in the darkness of the very back
corner of a small closet.
When we as adults take on the role of parents, guardians,
teachers, preachers, role models, etc., we have to accept the responsibility
that comes with influencing the lives of others. Influence is the greatest assignment anyone
could ever be given. Whatever role you
are given that charges you with the opportunity to make an impact on the life
of someone else, remember this story.
Concentrate on how bright you could make the path of the young person
watching you by your behavior. If you
are so blessed as to have children, realize their future may very well depend
on your present. What will you do with
your influence?
Much Love To You All……
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